Wednesday, April 13, 2011

✟Selfish + asking for the wrong things✟

Hi guys, it has been a min since I last blogged I know. But I have been going through some ups and downs lately and felt like giving my self a break would be sufficient for my mind. It was already a lot going on and blogging wasn't really on my mind. I really wanted to blog about being selfish or appearing selfish or ungrateful to myself. When it comes to me and praying to God no matter what it is, it always happens.

Not meaning a material thing but some intangibles like hope and faith. Stuff like that. But when I do pray for situations to go a certain way and they do, but not to my liking. I feel like I am being a ungrateful and selfish. I am not sure if I should feel this way, but sometimes I do. Like I wrote down the job I wanted, I got the exact job a few months later with all my criteria. I felt like my prayers had been answered. I finally had my a job that I thought I wanted. But the job turned out to be a dud. Yes it was everything I asked for, but it was also wayyy too over my head. Too advanced for my experience. Again, I asked and received but was I ungrateful because I wasn't happy. It's just been like this for me the last few mths. I keep asking myself why didn't this happen and this happened instead. Am I asking the wrong questions or something. Don't get me wrong I will never give up praying and believing that good things will come to those who wait. But at the same time I'm thinking like what did this mean and what did that mean. It is just hard to separate the two; getting what I sorta asked for and being ungrateful when I get what I sorta asked for. Yes, things could be so much worse, but can't help but think why me sometimes.

Thank you all for reading my blog
A little stressed, but always feeling blessed

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